Remember the days

2012-02-08T22:56:00.001-08:00

i never knew that what's on the surface is the opposite of what one really means.

2012-01-28T22:56:00.001-08:00

I feel like dedicating a post to s61, cos my class is really awesome!

Went to liane and jasmine’s house yesterday to bai nian, and I forgot to bring oranges somemore! every class outing make me feel happy that I belong to s61, because my class is just so fun and bonded! At first was steamboat and cos all the girls came late, then like me and liane were the only girls! But its fine too, haha had fun hearing tingzhou talk about his army stories and the guys had this like 2 hrs long army talk! Kept listening to army stories. Steamboat was delicious and awesome, but the guys keep suaning me for chionging for food and being a slacker because I didn’t help at all HAHA OOOPS. Junrong keep suaning me for my short hair but whatever man. (I know his secrets and he doesn’t know I know HAHAHA oops im so mean) afterwards we played blackjack and it was so fun cos I banluk 3 times and banban once, I was so frigging lucky I started w $0 but I earned like $5 from 50cents bet only! But I lost everything in the end cos the ‘fu2’ thingy me and yao kept trying to do didn’t work, both peanuts and pineapple tarts failed ): but well, it was so fun! Benny shouting at mel cos she took his money accidentally, us laughing at joel for putting his hands on yao’s waist (and jane’s reaction to that pic) ,us scolding liane (as usual), camwhoring! Its actually the last time we are gonna meet the guys! Quite sadddd. Anyways we moved onto jasmine’s house after tat which was so so freaking fun cos jasmine’s uncles are so funny!!! They entertained us by being banker, and intro-ed us to the new game which made us damn high but we lost even more money. Jasmine’s relatives are such nice people! And steamboat was good cos the veggie dam super awesome! Talk about our future and all, and we planned the next outing on FAday!! (i.e forever alone day = valentines’ day) so fun, cos class girls are all nto attached/bf in army! Hence we are all FA ): but im so so looking forward to vday now cos I will be meeting them and spending a romantic night w them! ^^ we are gonna go marina barrage and picnic with the beautiful night scene as our background! So eggcited heehee kyaaaaaa!! Really love s61 manz.

I remember during graduation day ceremony our class made yao go onto stage to play the tissue game! Which in the end she lost and she didn’t dedicate a good luck wish to s61!!! Angry. LOL. And also during prom, how all of us keep pushing liane down the bed cos she was being noisy and which ended up in the classic sentence we always use in genting, ‘STFU F YOU LIANE’ HAHAHA. On meiting’s birthday, how our entire class tricked meiting and made her so so so so confused cos we just keep insisting that nothing happened! Poor meiting, always kena bullied by the class!

Genting with my class was so much fun, love the cooling weather there and how we always laugh at each other, and our truth or truth talk at night, playing the rides and screaming at the indoor people at pizzahut just to make a lot a lot of noises. Keep singing rolling in the deep cos the pub keeps playing it,benny being hit on by the Malaysian woman, haunted house which was okay scary but yao and mel were super super scared, skipping around and around everywhere, bumper car with the fierce kids and Indians, took spaceshot twice, many many pics and also the photoshoot with joel’s jacket. Bunk with jasmine again, like the old cc days and the old geog trip days!

Love my class, I hope we will never grow apart and grow up to attend each other’s wedding and still laugh like how we always laugh :D all the best to the guys in army, which I think the next time I will meet the guys is during results release day ):

2011-12-30T22:19:00.000-08:00

Im feeling a bit lazy to type all this out so im starting 4days in advance before the year really ends. 2011 has been the toughest year of my life thus far I think, contrary to what I always thought, where we should be at the prime of our youths at the age of 18. Oh btw, pardon the lousy English my English sucked from young! Back to topic, being 18 is never easy especially when life threw me so many obstacles I faced daily. Mini challenges and setbacks throughout the entire year. Looking back at 2011 indeed there were many fond memories I would want to keep close to my heart. Awesome things happened, like being a ogl, having endless fun with my beloved class s61, my flute section and my atas band friends, even when studying with my friends was a fun thing. Yet, 2011 is also the year when I cried over many many many things. Some were pointless and to a large extent retarded, some tears shed were tears of disappointment. Times when no matter how hard you try and you just don’t get what you want, times when I see my efforts go down the drain. Also, many new and old friends to thank, those who gave me support no matter what through this entire year! 2011 is really a year that went by a little too fast ):

So it started off with Solaris 2011, which in my opinion is the best and happiest part of 2011. Thankful to be in oryon, and remained close even till today! We are the coolest OG man. OGL training was already a blast, I remembered how during the break, others OG were chit chatting and probably discussing cheers and we went to the back to camwhore! HAHA oryon’s the best og for me to be in due to the abundance of cool cameras I was really fascinated by hua’s and mel’s camera on the first day cos they were so cool. After training ended and school started, we all realized how we are in each other’s lecture but we never ever seen each other! Then it was banner painting, which took really long cos we were too busy camwhoring!! Just banner paintng alone and oryon took 2 FB albums worth of photos HAHA! Which also resulted in us being the last OG to finish the banner that day! Nevertheless those where the days~~ Then came the real orientation which was a blast. Now that I look back, I really wonder how on earth we could be so high every single day! Waking up at 6 reaching school at 7 for briefing, shouting and screaming for oryon, bring oryo(my subOG) around with awesome mel and Kenny lee tian ren! And ai’shah would bring honey water for us awwww <3 Cheering, mass dance, even when the freshies were at some lame talk, ogls also go back to the hall and lepak, and we always mass dance/ultimate ninja!! Made many new friends during ultimate ninja, like shuhadah! My ultimate opponent cos we were as pro as each other!! (: till now I can still mass dance quite well! And all the OG dinners at marina square, airport… hoping to relive some of these one day but it would be different already! I remembered once it was OGL dinner at airport! That night was reaaaaaaally super fun. We were too noisy tat the police came to look down from upstairs just when oryon girls went to sit at the corner! LOL. I cant remember what I did that night but I know oryon was the last to leave because we were in this circle HTHT-ing! And our circle of trust! (OMG suddenly remember) what said in the circle stayed in the circle. (: I remembered after day1 we all kena scolded cos we didn’t pick up our phones(I received a miss call from unknown number tat day oops…) and then we had to fill up balloons for wet games! Idk how to filling up balloons were fun too! Spraying water at each other etc. endless list to say when it comes to orientation! Oh ya Number 1 enemy I made during orientation , Cheryl teng sze hui. Nevertheless I still love you mummy cos you always make me laugh although you ignore me ALL THE TIME when I shamelessly shout mummy across so many people and make me paiseh and you slap my butt and hit me (but don’t worry I hit you back too) and all the timessss when you make me angry but I forgive you. ^^

I think one of the saddest times of this year is when van and liane left, during march! They were kinda like my pillars of support in class, always having liane around to bully, and van who will go toilet with me and let me scold her for her retardedness. I still remember the first time I saw them, was kinda shock at van’s height she’s almost 18cm taller than me, and liane’s burp which scared me so much cos she’s the most disgusting girl I ever knew! Over time we grew closer, and they are friends that I definitely want to keep forever. So that I can continue bullying liane, scolding her and kicking her, while cheating van! (omg I remember once van owe me apples so she told me to take her wallet and in the end I went to the fruit stall with liane and joanne and we all bought something using van’s money HAHAH im so meeeeean!) Departure was never easy, when we sent van off, I didn’t join the class for dinner because had band the entire day before going to the airport at night, took bus home alone, and cried the bus while reading van’s letter. Sending liane off was even worst. Cried sooo sooo sooo much. Even people who I didn’t expect to cry, cried. Really missed this two rich girls and slowly, I adapted to life without them. Frequent letters from van, and whatsapping with both of them, technology really kept us close in some way. True enough, being rich, they came back pretty often! Especially liane HAHA and s61 being mean as usual kept asking liane when is she going back LOL. They never changed, Melbourne didn’t change them. On the other hand, I think their departure made s61 even more bonded. Not suaning van or liane, but maybe their departure made our class closer because we treasured each other more? Idk how to put this haha. But im really glad to be in s61, I cant ask anymore from s61 because, we are cool like that. Despite our various cliques, we are still close as a class together! We help each other(our 10s61 geog book (‘: ), we scold teachers together (the epic HAWK lol ooooooops), we play PE enthu-ly (esp the girls, Adiv badminton and soccer! Oh and btw I got gold for napfa this year HAHAHA), we eat together (how mel always scold me for eating sauce chicken thrice per week), how we can make so many class jokes ( tou nao sheng cao, bluffing meiting on her birthday, mel’s imitation of ms wong, all the time when we tease the class guys cause of HAWK, s61 watching ICSnight together we were the noisiest class there etc) and many many more memories. Im really blessed to be in s61, naughty yet we put in our best to do well to our best ability, everyone will do well for As together (: I remembered when we got back our geog results during CT2, and most of our scores were 50 and above, we were really happy! Then came prelims when all of us did better too! H1 as well!! So glad that ms suriani was our geog teacher, she is our geog savior <3 and mr teo, our dearest GP teacher! Thanks mr teo, for always playing with our class and stand our nonsenses! BEST GP TEACHER EVER. :D and to ms wong, who I’m sure loved our class a lot towards the end! Ms wong is a really good teacher, especially during consultations, so patient and nice. Idk how to put into words how she is a secretly very very very funny teacher! And nice, and good. She praises us when we do well! Remember how benny answered a question correctly and all of us went ‘woooooah benny (Y) benny! Woohoo benny!’ and ms wong couldn’t hide her ummchio face and told benny good job too!! The amount of effort she puts into her teaching, she’s really a dedicated teacher. I hope future batches will know to treasure Ms wong, because I respect her a lot now! JC life would be so so much different without s61 and my teachers. S61 is the best class I can ever ask for, I think the best class I had in my entire schooling life! And we are losing people gradually because sagar went back to india and junyi went back to Malaysia! But s61 will be held close to my heart <3 so eggcited for class trip in jan with s61 to genting!!!! Omg it will be so so so so much fun. Cant wait.

Another group of people that played a role in my J2 life, my band mates :D first up, the whiney ahlian fi ailin! :D fate really brought us together because we actually met each other in sec 4 before! (but I don’t remember lin, im so sorry lol!) then we were in the same subOG after she transferred into vj on the 2nd day! And we ended up in the same CCA same section, and practically the only flute batchmate I had at that time! Depended on each other quite a lot especially during the start! And of course we clicked off really well because of her low xiao dian and my awesome sense of humour! Went through majestia, NSSN, SYF together and also laughing at people together, making jokes together, whining to each other etc etc. and studying together fot CT2 during the whole of june holidays in school! With Raphael and lisa too! Getting chased out of classrooms all the time (blame on my badluck), going out for lunch forcing me to decide what to eat because all 3 of them were indecisive, playing with cats every single day (nurul Fatimah and siti!! And the kittens omg I forgot their names except for ami and zumzum), our tian wang yi, bus rides home with Raphael and lisa. I cant believe I actually spend on whole month everyday in school to study! And without lin, Raphael, lisa, studying days will definitely be much more stressful and sad! Thanks lisa for being nice all the time (I still owe you duck rice money)! And those SYF days when I sat beside you in band and how we always talk during band and complain about dr goh! HAHA. And you always collude with yanhao to bluff me that iggy caught me messaging! HAHA all the fun part of my band life, not forgetting my slacker atas friends, bao constance and jiahui! Omg really miss those days when we take circle line home together, talking about LOF, band, and making really funny jokes out of everything! How we try to slack as much as possible etc! thanks jiahui, for always fetching me home and cracking me up with all your act hot, act cute, act ____ (I forgot) and your really weird sense of humour! I remember constance and I went to crash peiwen, liane and marcel’s prata dinner just because we wanted to hop onto peiwen’s taxi HAHA and how constance wrote a rap for me(awww!) and us shuffling at the MRT station! Happy times during band (:

After band officially came to an end, life was pretty much same for the remaining parts of the year. Studying was my main priority, and so did camping at the library! Days studying for prelims was spent with vjcedar people, mostly qien and Sharon! Thanks to them and of course many other library friends that made studying less painful! I remember how qien always draw a lot of random stuff on my paper or her paper! those days when we all get so tired from school and yet we have no choice but to continue studying. The time at which we left the library became later and later, originally going home at 530 but this extended to 630 and eventually on some days 730! As prelims approached, more and more people began to study at the library! I remembered this was how I got to know Dilip because kahyeen forced him to wave to me! a lot of random jokes were created on our way home, in the library, outside the library( I remember puay and Sharon laughed at the way I walked zzz heehee), when I forced qien to go to the canteen with me and many more. And I have to seek forgiveness because selfish me started to book tables also because there were just too many people in the library! Oh I remembered once benny and his gang were playing cards in the library and Terence lost! It was after hair for hope and then Terence had to go over to one guy who was botak and act like he was shaving his head! It was super duper hilarious I think half of the library was laughing at Terence! Post prelim days were spend in school and sengkang CC. Going to school early with sherm and junhao, going to the library to sit at our favourite seats, lunching with qien Sharon puay (remember our can everyone give me 10c joke) and us celebrating puay’s birthday (she think she popular because there were 2 groups of people celebrating birthday for her). Once Sharon qien and I were the last to leave the school library! Then we went to sit outside the library to finish up our work, and fro some reason qien kept hitting me!(Sharon you’re the witness) And we would go take free apples from Ms jancy heehee! After lessons officially ended, the remaining days were spent at sengkangCC! Made friends with jomain, clement, Samuel, pearleen and many more, like Hua An who are mostly nice people (: It was dreadful to go to the cc every single day, Monday to Sunday, 8am to 10pm without fail! Just doing and doing, memorizing geog, practicing maths and chem, forcing myself to do econs CSQ and essays, GP essays and compre etc. The best part of sengkang CC is obviously the free food! Haha and the nice tea from uncle tony! Nice porridge especially on rainy days! Got so sick of sengkang food which partially caused my very bad appetite during the As period! I didn’t have to eat sometimes, and I wouldn’t feel hungry! Special mention to jasmine who was always there to ask question and whine and laugh at people during the CC days! Our stagnant wave!! After Geog P1 only me and jasmine had 8 days till our next geog P2! Remember that Saturday when we sat at the back of the cc and chat for 1 hr because we were too bored and in the end I went home early because I was too unproductive! Till the end of the 8 days we started complaining because we cant finish studying! Omg we are so joke.

2011 was a difficult year because of that constant disappointment emotion and feeling demoralized over and over again where I don’t see future in myself. Days when I doubt myself were too common I just go to bed not wanting to wake up anymore! Thanks sherm for always being there, always. But I have to appreciate what I enjoyed in this entire year. Orientation is one, class orientation where 11s61 won 1st place for sea regatta(omg still so proud of my junior class!), shadow living beyond what he was expected to(pleasepleaseplease let this continue), 10s61 being the best class I can ever ask for, my mum for always standing my nonsense, all my friends for standing my whines and even whine with me, for making me laugh.

To 2012, I just want to be happy. Please let shadow and my family remain healthy!

GOODBYE 2011, HELLO 2012.

2011-12-10T08:53:00.000-08:00

i last blogged on 5th august.

OMG its been really long! but i feel so nostalgic today cos for some reason i had a lot of fun today (: firstly was clare's bday surprise!! it was fun preparing it w natalie and chatting w her! then we went to clare's house and it was baaaad cos we tried to find her house! went up and down and got tired! plus i was already really late to send sagar off!! soz clare couldnt stay for long ): i know our surprise wasnt the best bday present ever but, i really hope you will be happy :D love ya k <3

rushed to airport to a whole dramatic situation! ran soooo sooo much! And like sagar waited for me! AWW, really appreciated sagar man. it was fun having him around! may not be that close to him, but he is a friend to remember definitely :D quite sad during dapearture, felt sad to see him leaveeee! our class so on man, i like, the entire class turn up!! rushed in front to say bye to raj! not very close friend too but just hope that it wouldnt be the last time i'll be seeing them! love how sagar is just that smart bright light in our class, he will open his patel industry and employ all of us (:

then it was dinner, and gossiped w the girls haha. the guys bought FHM magazine for junyi omgosh! girls wrote our nice letters heehee. and then, send junyi off and the s61 hug was epic funny!!! cant stop laughing at it! liane is retarded, she sms all the way from hongkong just to tell me eugene lum saw us LOL. then we forced meiting to hug junyi HAHAHA. then we all left and, the night is still young HAHA.

sengkang gang decided to supper, and I led everyone to jalan kayu roti prataaaa! :D me benny weiming joel and kelly!! ^^ chat a lot! benny was funny telling us about him and jasmine, weiming and all the odac stories! omg and how a filippino woman hit on benny!! LOL! fun fun fun, laughed a lot. facebook poke and everything! And how benny wanted to take pic in front of the prata shop and everyone stared at us HAHA. so fun! really love my class man <3

its sad cos knowing how lazy my class is, we all wouldnt mind meeting up but we are all too lazy to plan!! would really miss this bunch of friends, its so nice how we can bond with each other despite our cliques and everything! dont wanna lose this group of friends (':

haha i think nobody reads this already right, and im not scared to admit already la. reallt hope things will turn out fine between me and him, cos i dont wanna lose a friend like him! (: no no no, im not together with him! just saying, cos i never wanted to hurt him or hurt myself la. im easily touched, but i know my limits (: wanna just say, its been nice to know someone actually cares for you this much that its overwhelming sometimes, but just, dont wanna lose a friend like him!! Really dont want.

and i wanna dedicate this to my new HTHT friend, GOH WANJUN! hahaha, idk why i think we are in the same boat so i can tell you stuff unlike how i hide from others. thanks for always being w me and supportng me! and i will always always, support you and jo <3 ummchio queen wanjun! still loving our prom pic haha!

yay life been good this few days, but my plans stop today! HAHA gonna be a parasite again cos i dont wanna study neither do i wanna work LOL IM SORRY IM SUCHA SLACKER. but c'mon guys it has just been, 11 days since As ended. i may be complacent and doesnt deserve this much of a slack given the amount of effort i put in, but i wanna just relax. never gonna get ssuch a long break ever again! must start planning cos i dont wanna waste my time away!

AIM NO.1 : GONNA LEARN HOW TO COOK FOR REAL
AIM NO.2 : LEARN A NEW LANGUAGE!

yay, me love life, for now.

love my mum and shadow too <3 long live shadow, cant live without you ):

2011-08-05T21:35:00.000-07:00

im 18years and 2 days old today (:

i pray for my happy 18th year for my life!
just want to be happy and carefree.
Put in more effort, and get my results that i want.
this 18th is special.
thanks oryon <3
and thank you.

2011-07-24T08:16:00.000-07:00

Well, I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess it’s safe to say, baby, safe to say
that I-I’m officially missin’ you

for beloved Van and liane (:

and sherm for always being there!<3 180degree emotioncal change from just now.
Imma happy girl ^^

2011-07-24T04:31:00.000-07:00

Not this same feeling again.
Hasnt been feeling very awesome in recent weeks.
i sorta faced up and accepted that i cant clique with my clique anymore
(lol it ryhmes hurhur)
and idk, i think i sorta gave up
like i dont force myself to sit with them again
i try my best not to think about if whenever we dont sit tgt
and i try my best to talk to everyone in class to make myself feel less left out
but at the same time i cant stop thinking about how the class people will see me
being extremely self concious about this...
because i feel like a joke if i keep on attaching myself to them
cos everyone knows that we are no longer how we used to be
at the same time if i join the others
i feel like im intruding into their cliques
so im stuck in the middle of nowhere
yups. same sick feeling everyday
but idk, i think ive accpeted and trying to move on
cos sometimes i know we are still close friends
and we still occasionally have fun converstaions and laughters
but i guess not as often as last time yeah
im not blaming anyone here! i still love both of them
and i really treat them as my good friends!
its just in a different way yeah?

prelims in 5 weeks. As in less than 4 mths.
its crazily scary idk how i can get through all this.
but i have to.
sometimes i can really cry just thinking about this
how unprepared i am. how i dont see a future in myself
how i can cry so easily simply talking about how suck my results are
and how much everything around me seem to be crumbling down
i was kinda...not sad. but couldnt bear, couldnt bear to see liane and van leave Singapore
cos i know they are doing well and enjoying the prime of their youths there
and i wanna be like them. i really want to.
so i guess i just have to pull through this shit.
3 more months. JUST THREE FREAKING MONTHS.
i must do this.

and to the special someone.
i saw this coming. im growing to feel.
to feel that sense of being special to someone.
to become used to recieving messages from you.
super long ones. and i know. im not the only girl you sent it to before.
but idk. its just me. being attached to things and emotions too easily.
i just hope nothing will happen.
i dont want anything to happen
let things stay status quo for now?
so dear whoever that is above,
dont play with my emotions.
because my inner thought kill me inside.

stop overthinking Jerine.
nothing good is coming out of this.

and as usual, friends from melbourne,
dont worry about me. im fine i really am!
i hope you guys are happily eating food or playing now (:
always missing you two. <3
ps. LIANE SITOH OWE ME A LOT OF THINGS.
and vannnnnnn. where's my letter!

haha in case shermaine ng sih ming you are reading this.
dont worry about your fringeeeee you look extremely fine with or without your fringe!
and i still love you no matter what heehee <3
dont think too much about what i type!
you know i dont like to talk about such stuff hur.
<3 youuuuu!

2011-07-11T08:39:00.000-07:00

i dont wanna hope for a good score cos i will be disappointed but i secretly want to get a good score. The contradiction. ):

2011-07-03T22:28:00.001-07:00

just finished marley and me online
its a damn good movie, i love it.
as usual, made me cry
its honestly one of the better doggies stories
if i talk about shadow now i will start crying again so i better dont
my eyes are pretty swollen! nyak

2011-07-03T10:00:00.000-07:00

3rd day of the long weekend.
days after CTs have been nothing but AWESOME.
waking up at 3, after sleeeping for 14hrs. its just shiok! :D
i love sleeping. and i would neer ever sleep this much again, in a few more months
until after prelims i guess ):
hae been going out with the same ppl, but im happy no matter (:
been to flea, town a couple of times, and OGL dinner tmr yipee. ^^
just finished packing my stuff that has been lying around for days!
realised i have to do mindmaps and geog prep ):
but, time to get back on track jerine!
to start with im such a weak student. shouldnt be playing for 4 days
according to ho wei kang, can only play 2 days
but im sorry i cant! need more rest and play than that.
CTs are kinda screwed up ):
although i tried not to make them screw up
but i guess i didnt try enough
i know i didnt, but i did try
please show a tenny weeny bit of results pls?
kays, shall not hope for anything.
cos, expectation = dissapointment. learnt tat from CT1.

today was JTS at ecp! food was okay, cooked by Lisa the master chef.
had some fun talking rubbish with her! as usual.
she calling me ah so and me playing with her messages
quite a lot j2s came i guess, at least the usual few?
but the went off to play lan! zzz.
lin came cand we went to ride bicycleeeeeee!! YAYYY :D
didnt ride for long but i felt happy to feel the wind!!
its soooooooo cooling ^^
on the way home with lisa, and we starte to send weird messages to raphael!
and omg raphael is no.1 retarded!!
he actually belived we cycled to mandai zoo from ECP just to see lions
and we paid $20 to get in!?
and he seriously believed it!
omg my junior~~~ my Sia La.

ANYWAYS, i wanted to type more
but seems like shermaine ng sih ming has broken into my blog!
oh noooooooooooooo ):
the reason why i dont want you to read,
is cos i think you know me too well!
AND HENCE YOU WILL KNOW WHAT IM TYPING.
SO.
BYEBYE.

2011-06-19T09:19:00.001-07:00

The best feeling on earth. (:
today morning.

2011-06-17T08:15:00.000-07:00

hello world. 9 more days to CT2
time has been passing by real quickly, its not giving me the opp to breathe
been putting in more effort this time round
but it never seems to be enough
i dunno why i don feel motivated to study anymore
in the past my breaks was like listen to one song on 933
now my breaks are like 40min long
waste time only
although i really enjoy playing with nurul fatimah siti(school cats)
they are soo cute! esp Siti. nurul is just some lazy pig oinkoink
the cats bring me joy everyday
idk how am i gonna fare for CT2 this time
geog is like a piece of shit
idk ho to do it anymore. Mrs Koh save me )':
really hoping that i can pull my maths and chem up
pretty pls ):
i really need to improve my grades. by a lot

and to liane and van
you two paranoid friends. IM FINE DONT WORRY ABT ME
and LIANE, I DONT LIKE ANYBODY.
so stop guessing what i am saying okay.
and i wont tell anyways so yah.
have fun and study hard too~!
bet life's good over there. definately better than in here.
suffocating on oxygen.

may the day comes when we can talk normally
cos friends around us are making things worse only

2011-06-10T21:56:00.000-07:00

At times like this, i realise even more that, there is no space for me to be inside both of your worlds. and this is sad because i have to pretend i belong there when i dont. I shall stop reading, in case it makes me sadder.

anyways,
i've been wanting to thank someone. Someone who makes me feel that i am wanted, and making feel loved. I really hope we can be friends. Thanks for everything. You may not know, but i think if the impulse comes, we might walk through the future tgt. Just saying.

2011-05-24T06:56:00.000-07:00

A game well played. A battle well fought.

Watched fball boys ytd. and it was soooooo awesome cos i feel SO much for them even though i don play fball at all. maybe its cos my friends are in it. but besides that, i really felt that strong sense of perserverence and courage to fight on till the very end. Floorball, our goal at the last 16th second. It was so beautiful and awesome idk how to describe my feelings at that moment. When the clock timer started, 16,15,14....10,9,8 we had the possession of the ball. We were giving our last best energy to just push it through. But we couldnt make it. 5-4. IT WAS SOOO FREAKING CLOSE. i felt damn sad after the match cos it was SO close. and the guys fought SO hard and the passion they had to get that final champion trohphy. The moment the ref blew the whistle. Seeing the boys look so dejected. it was THAT close. but it wasnt meant to be.

After the match, i really felt like joining a sport. i wonder how it feels to be in a team. to feel that sense of achievement when anybody score. feel that bonded spirit within themselves and no other one can penetrate through. seeing how one person's mistake or goal can turn the whole match around. Going through all the physical and mental training together.

No matter what, i really wanna say that, it is VJ sports that made me feel like i belong here. And i want to belong here. Let me choose again, i will choose VJ. cos just from match supporting, the amount of school spirit and the force that comes out from the team shows how VJ is one big team.

Today, at soccer girls finals. our girls owned the field. Chris is DAMN pro she was reaaaaally good. like a boy. even guys didnt kick balls as well as her. but soccer boys was the highlight. Raj was good. He kept very well. sadly it was that one goal that the opponent scored in first half. THAT ONE GOAL. after that opponent was just delaying time. our boys fight on so much. Dilip, PK, santosh, they all tried so many times. Missed goals, offside, evrything. But im still proud of them. Cos they showed me what sportsmanship was. What perserverence was. What teamwork was. and most importantly what VJ can do.

Go floorball, Go soccer.
I SWEAR I WILL BE BACK NEXT YEAR. to watch us win.

go vj sports. I'm proud of all my friends! Eugene, Junhao, Afi, Khai.

2011-05-16T19:53:00.001-07:00

what do i want to do if i can do anything i want.

ans:

quit school and find myself.

2011-05-16T19:50:00.001-07:00

can i really hold on for 2 more weeks
i really really hate this shit
and i cant control myself from comparing with others
feeling damn lost and alone
i wanna do well
but im not
face it jerine

and im becoming vulgar.
f.

2011-05-05T08:13:00.000-07:00

no matter what,
im glad that ive been through the journey with all the awesome band friends <3
lin,
my section,
jiahui,
bao,
con-con-con-constance,
yunsol ahjushhi,
iggy the bald.
and everyone else.

thank you for making me enjoy band for once.

2011-05-02T08:09:00.001-07:00

and why am i drowning in my own insecurities.

2011-04-29T18:35:00.000-07:00

i don't know where else to write except here cos i might irritate ppl =/
so i just wanna say, its alrd 30th april, one day after my 2.4
but im still very happy over my 2.4 results because
not only i reached and did better than what i aimed,
most importantly,
i proved to myself that, i can do it. and i will make it there.
all the way jerine, keep this motivation.
gotta say sorry again i pushed shili accidentally at the ending ): im really sorry ):

on a side note, 4 more days, 2 more pracs, 1 last performance.
let's go vjcsb. <3

2011-04-21T22:02:00.000-07:00

those who keep silent,
hurts the most.

2011-04-17T08:33:00.000-07:00

when life get you down,
you know what to do?

JUST KEEP SWIMMING~
JUST KEEP SWIMMING~
JUST KEEP SWIMMING~

just heard our recording at the exchange,
i think memories is good!
symphony still can improve. i think the balance is quite off at the end!
and my grace notes and 2 bars before rehearsal44 ):
but i can hear my high high Bflat (Y)

2011-04-09T19:36:00.000-07:00

i'm so weak physically, mentally
crumbling under a tiny amt of stress
maybe its just,
i cannot take anymore disspointment anymore.
to the extent, im about to lose myself.

heart's so broken, soul's so lost.

2011-04-09T08:14:00.000-07:00

reflection time~

after today's perf, im more sure of how the band sounds like now.
the rehearsal was really energy draining,
and time wasting omg.
i mean we shld like focus on the music and going through march winds esp
cos like the balance is damn bad.
don really get why we must cut to 2 per part and still listen
like quite waste time
besides tat, R + exco was being anal abt stockings.
like seriously. WHY MUST WEAR STOCKINGS.
okay la, makes our legs look nicer right.
but which panal of judges look at the band's legs.
its music right. they damn lame laaaaaaaaa.
anyways bus ride was really long. to RP at woodlands!

half way through the song got scolded by dr goh
after that was okay le. i meant we have more concentration
more focus and have musical direction
btw the atmosphere there is REALLY BRR BRR-ING COLD.
went back to schoool feeelng uber hungry like a pig!
packed up and all.

then start the scolding session.
i can understand iggy for being angry. actually more of dissapointed i guess.
im sure he is super worried for his results
and as the band pres that we have very high expectations on
the seniors have very high expectations on him too
and we don follow what he say
makes ur feel guilty la. esp when he cried.
we really really cannot be the frirst band in vjcsb history to get a silver.
really really really cannot.

i think aisyah's part was good. she really did well in encouraging us
and at the same time make ur reflect and ponder over
if this is really what we want to get.
4th may is wed. 5th may thurs. thurs combine assembly.
if we get up to stage. CAN WE ANNOUNCE TO THE SCHOOL THAT
VJCSB IS HONOURED TO RECIEVE A GOLD/GWH AT SYF CENTRAL JUDGING
i want. i want to go up stage to announce tat we got gold/gwh.
if we ever get anything lesser than a gold, i wont wanna go up the stage as well.

lets not talk abt ros's part. i kinda forgot the very motivational speech she made that pushed us on to work towards our goal -.-

all in all.
I WILL WORK HARD FOR THE BAND. AT LEAST TILL SYF IS OVER.
I NEED THAT GOLD. SO BADLY.
TO PROVE TO ME THAT MY LIFE ISNT THAT SCREWED AFTER ALL.
PLEASE.

2011-04-05T06:49:00.000-07:00

Note from Mr Teo:

-If it is not necessary for 4 H2, why hold on?
-tell yourself what went wrong
-im far from my goals, but DON GIVE UP.
-don think about, why am i studing for. Just go for the grades first.
-and push on
-LOOK FORWARD.

2011-03-30T05:51:00.000-07:00

and yes, you can't hear,
but i am screaming inside.

2011-03-30T05:27:00.000-07:00

this is the __th time im saying this

i'm tired.
tired of feeling like shit
tired of trying
tired of crying
tired of whining
tired of not being able to do anything about it
tired of being lonely
tired of finding someone to talk but nobody's there
tired of failing
tired of acting
tired of faking
tired of pretending
tired of wishing

out of all. im tired of feeling tired.
trapped in this cycle of unhappiness and helplesness.

2011-03-29T06:46:00.000-07:00

there isnt someone out there that makes me happy.
maybe its time to look beyond even though its difficult

2011-03-21T10:12:00.000-07:00

Life is like a carousel, it keeps going.
New people will enter your life and others leave.
In the end, you will have to choose who to keep and let those who wish to leave, go

I WANT TO KEEP
-VANESSA NG WAN CHENG
-LIANE SITOH LI YING
-RAYNA KAM
-JOANNE CHEW
-SHERMAINE NG
-SHARON QUO
-FONG QI EN
-LIOW RUOYU

2011-03-21T10:01:00.000-07:00

anything related to you two are tears inducing now.

-1.01am I'm still crying.

2011-03-21T09:36:00.000-07:00

i don't know how to feel anymore
i really wished you two never ever left
so i wont be crying here alone, at 1237am
i didnt know seperation will hurt so much
caused the tears to flow uncontrollable
no matter how hard i try to stop
but i cant

but now all i can do is to move on
and hope for the best for the two of you.
must be happy okay? i hope you two still read my blog once in a while
so you guys will know
i'm missing you too. A lot.

wake me up, when liane&van comes back.

loving you two, a lot. <3

2011-03-20T01:10:00.000-07:00

tumblr pics.

plus,
-someone who will pat my head (:
-backhug
-let me eat what i want
-talk non-stop to me
-someone i can really trust.

but, this is too perfect. no one like this exists, right.

2011-03-19T08:07:00.000-07:00

today, i send van off.
i didnt cried at the airport.
i guess its just cos i didnt have enough time with her.
i saw reuben and i was observing him.
he look so sad, tat for once, i actually think he isnt that bad either.
i guess it is really so much more painful for him
all in all, he really loved her.
too bad, they werent meant to be.
didnt join class for astons,
too tired. woke up since 7 you see.
on my way back,
感激遇到你was on repeat.
i messaged van, that im glad she appeared in my life even if its for a short while
she replied.
we had quick exchanges, telling her to take care
then at 1025, she messaged me "shit"
and i felt it coming.
she is leaving, her plane is flying off already.
i started crying on the bus.
and it just passed by the runways for the airplanes.
when reality strikes, it really hurts the most.

van,
thanks for being part of my life.
i understand, people come, people go.
but i don want you to go.
please keep in contact with me.
i don wanna lose you as my friend.
):
i'll miss you greatly.

2011-03-10T06:36:00.000-08:00

books i want to read:

my sister's keeper
a walk to remember
dear john
tuesdays with morrie
the notebook

WOAH JERINE I AM ACTUALLY READING!

2011-03-06T05:43:00.000-08:00

TODAY, 6TH MARCH - ONE DAY BEFORE CTS.

jerine, its time to set a new goal.
to stop procrastinating, stop slacking, stop relying on people
you've seen the results released on friday right
im sure you don want to be one of those crying because they didnt do well
you should be those crying
because your efforts paid off, and you get the results you wwant
or do even better.
you need to conteol your own life, not lettting life control you
things may go wrong,
circumstances may make you fail yourself,
situations are get uncontrollable,
the unpredictable happended
but thru this all
you know you will MAKE IT RIGHT.
its your life, you are in charge of it
no more exucses like 'why is life so bad to me'
its not that, YOU SHOULD HAVE THE DETERMINATION TO DO IT YOUSELF
TO MAKE IT RIGHT YOURSELF
for this, sacrifices must be made
other than the usual less tv, computer
rememebr to balance work and play
and REALLY cut down on playing
its A levels. just a freaking 8 months later
so many to do
GIVE YOURSELF A BEST SHOT
IF NOT
YOU WILL JUST REGRET LIKE HOW YOU AER REGRETTING NOW THAT YOU DIDNT STUDY FOR CTS
AND MAY BE LOSING THE OPPORTUNITY TO PLAY IN SYF
its a self challenge.
so now,
MAKE IT WORK.

if you are reading this cos you're feeling not motivated anymore,
rememebr that at the end of the journey
you will be happy at your results
because the efforts you put in paid off
just push a little harder,
crying a little more,
stress a but but more.
and there you go.
be like celine, 5As and 1B.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE CAPABLE FOR IT
make mummy and shadow proud.

GO FOR IT JERINE.
I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT.

<3, JERINE ON 6TH MARCH.

2011-03-05T00:07:00.000-08:00

I WOKE UP FEELING LIKE SHIT AND MY BODY ACHE WAS SO BAD
i whined and cried through the day until just now
when i woke up from my 2nd nap of the day
i went to bathe straight away
and while i was showering
i realise that,
its not life tat is being challenge to me
its myself.
i should be the one deciding what my life will be.
so if i want it to be happy,
i will be happy!
got back my energy and positivity.
way to go, Jerine.
It's just the start, i'm going to pull through A's too.
next year when the results are released,
im going to see A A A B B on it.
As for chem maths geog
Bs for GP econs
i'm going to make it work. I WILL.

2011-03-04T07:51:00.001-08:00

HAHH
dun tink bout all this la!
scare urself only
u silly girl
i can totally imagine u chionging up the steps

sometimes you pull me at my heartstrings randomly. (:

2011-03-04T06:54:00.000-08:00

MY LIFT JUST BROKE DOWNW AT 2230HRS ON 4TH MARCH
I CLIMBED 21 STOREYS TO REACH MY HOUSE
2 FLIGHT OF STAIRS EACH
7 STEPS PER STAIRS
294 STEPS IN TOTAL.
IM SHAGGIFIED. GONNA CRASH NOW.

2011-03-03T07:21:00.000-08:00

im not getting back up on my feet
wanna just sleep my night away
im so screwed i wanna just cry my sad life away
posivity died out in 6days.
but then aagain i wanna pwove people wrong
that im not just whatever you see on my surface.

what can i do now, helpless.

and btw, im super hungry i think i have gastric.

2011-03-03T03:11:00.000-08:00

why are we made to go through this shit.

2011-03-03T01:49:00.000-08:00

everything came too quickly. came too wrongly.
a joke turned disaster.
first time ever in the VP's room
its not for a good reason
national celebrities, spoiling school reputation, didnt trust us
that's all you had to say right
i don think you called us there just to hear our part of the story
since you already have a judgement bout it
then why bother listening
you didnt turst us anyways
so be it.
im just suay.
national celebrity right.
congrats for being the first person i use the F word on.

2011-02-26T17:01:00.000-08:00

JERINE TEO KAI TING
TIM ETO PICK YOURSELF UP
I WILL BE A HAPPY GIRL FORM TODAY ONWARDS
STRESSED UP, BUT NOT GIVE UP.
PUSH IT ON TO THE END
COS THESE ARE JUST SMALL CHALLENGES IN LIFE
SEE THE BIGGER PICTURE
I'LL BE FINE :D
LOVE. LIVE. LOVE <3

CANT WAIT FOR CTs TO BE OVER, WANNA SEE THE 2 RICH GALS.
(:

爱上你第一的夏天

2011-02-25T17:21:00.001-08:00

greatest fear: lack of social accpetance, change

):

2011-02-25T00:16:00.001-08:00

worst day of school since 2011 started.
well, 2011 wasnt a good year to start with.
im sick, 9days to CTs
so not prepared. i wanna just die and die and die.
never to wake up ever again.
school's tough.
never felt this way in my life before
in a canteen filled with so many people
yet i feel so much alone.
behind fake smiles and fake laughters
sometimes life is too much for me
i cannt take it anymore.
anal teacher sitting on the bench
treat me like im a delinquent
insult my personal character.
what am i thinking. this is just the start i guess
more tears and pain coming along the way
why am i like this.

2011-02-21T01:44:00.000-08:00

jerine, don be so silly.
wake up.

2011-02-14T06:06:00.000-08:00

its valentine's day today.
i love my friends <3
just wishing that there will be someone in future to spend this day with.
feeling so lantern-ish. NYAK.

2011-02-12T04:01:00.000-08:00

i think as we grow up, there's a growing improtance of valentine's day.

2011-02-03T05:36:00.000-08:00

this is how sweet kenny is! we need a kenny clone everywhere. AWWWW sweet ttm! ><

ORYON TO THE BEAT NOW
B C B
TWO TIMES
B B C B
THREE TIMES
B B C B B C B B C B
ORYON BREAK IT DOWN NOW
B C B B C
B C B B C
B C B B C
B B B

(chinese version)
B C B
两次
B B C B
三次
B B C B B C B B C B
现在打断
B C B B C
B C B B C
B C B B C
B B B

(malay version)
nasi padang
B C B
dua
B B C B
di-ka
B B C B B C B B C B
mee goreng
B C B B C
B C B B C
B C B B C
B B B

(thai version)
sawadeekap
B C B
___
B B C B
___
B B C B B C B B C B
tom yum soup!
B C B B C
B C B B C
B C B B C
B B B

(japanese version)
konichiwah!
B C B
ni!
B B C B
san!
B B C B B C B B C B
sushi tei/nihon murah/sakae sushi!
B C B B C
B C B B C
B C B B C
B B B

(KOREAN VERSION- THE HIGHLIGHT)
anneonyhaseayo!
B C B
Kim!(KIMBERLY?)
B B C B
chi!(we didnt really hear this)
B B C B B C B B C B
SARANGHAEYO
B C B B C
B C B B C
B C B B C
B B B

2011-02-02T05:28:00.000-08:00

having very bad withdrawal symptoms ):
i miss orientation!

2011-02-02T02:27:00.000-08:00

SOLARIS '11.
it ended on 1st feb! a long journey way back from november last year yeah?
from ogl training, to banner painting, to contacting freshies, to everything. I can say i have never regretted any part of it. This is a too fun experience to be missed, or lefted out. It was a good choice to be part of OGL'11. (: i can remember how thigns were the first time, crazily awkward much. and the only full ogl meeting we had was one day befroe ogl training. but, everythign worked out fine too. Made so many new friends in my dearest oryon :D Weewee, jess, john, zhihua, aisyah, cheryl, faris, hillary, jovyne, yilin, sebastian, and my oryo mates, KENNY AND MEL :D the best company ever. we can laugh so much and talk so much and camwhore so much! swear we are the most camwhore OG can. esp when we have so many cool cameras in our og! awesome shit. i remember how we called up the freshies, kenny laughing and speaking like a newscaster, they both laughing at me when i talk(NYAKK), wondering who our freshies was, desgining og banner and painting it, making our identity, practising our walk in with the damn cool music, the memorable bus55 rides, the dunno how many times we played ultimate ninja, how many times we talked bout cute guys and pretty girls. There's just too many memories created in this whole process. Its okay that we arent the winners cos it doesnt matter that much to me. instead i had lots of fun that i will remember forever.

my O6, ORYO. thanks for being sooooo spontaneous during orientation! although we literally push you guys up the stage to do stuff, and we pushed boonhao and regine twice somemore. but thanks for being so nice and awesome okay :D and cheering and dacning despite it being very tiring. Love you guys! sorry to the some of you that i cant get your names cos you guys look a bit alike >< i hope you all can do well for everything and be the best victorian in you! and become a ogl cos we were the best ogls we can be for you all :D to kenny and mel, thanks for being the best sub og mates ever! kenny lee tian ren thanks for taking up the main responsiblity in the grp! sorry me and mel keep leaving you behind >< you are the best kenny! i am honestly damn touched by whatever you did for kim she's really damn lucky to have you as her bf! i love you, AS A FRIEND OKAY! you really too sweet le cannot stand it. esp the part when you say you got wedding plans with her, and the kim saranghaeyo thing OMG OMG MELTSSSSSSS. our og girls will supoprt you all the way! don be sad/emo okay >< its scary ttm! to mel, although we fight everyday, but i still love you! my bark is harder than my bite(m i using this correctly) so don angry okay! i'll tell you stuff when i can, and when im allowed to. (: so meanwhile you can think of stories to tell me! and stop thinking that i like him k. and thanks for ganging up w me to suan john everytime! always on my side HAHA:D esp when we suan him umm chio-ing, i always think its damn funny!

to all my new friends, thanks for being friendly! like marcus xinan amanda wei loong terrence jamie, you guys made orientation even better than it is! haha all you guys are funny and nice, please wave to me in school! marcus is the best cos he is the only person that can fight mel. HAHAHAH:D awesome!

never once regretting it, SOLARIS'11. <3

ogls lets keep as close as we are okay! PLEASE. you guys are too fun to drift away, remember our circle of trust and honestly *HOOK PINKY*

2011-01-25T04:13:00.000-08:00

my favourite time is the first 3 seconds after i wake up

cos after that,
reality hits like a ton of heaevy stones.

2011-01-24T03:33:00.000-08:00

superficiality hurts.
i miss days when i was young,
back then,
i was the real me.

2011-01-22T22:19:00.000-08:00

hello world.
the week past by quickly, and its orientation this week!
screw napfa cos i failed and the worst thing is i cried LOL
SO EMBARESSING CAN
that shall be my random fact if oryon plays the game again.
HAHAHAAH :D so hilarious I REALLY DUNNO WHY I CRIED

anyways,
i was glad i made the right choice to talk to you last night!
after like 2 months long of not talking haha ><
and i was just thinking back of the times last year man
lol og bbq, and the after effects.
used to go online cos of you
i think i go less now cos of you too
but yeah. thanks for the memories! my experience in life haha ><
i like the fact that we are both non-veggies ppl and we love the same kind of food!
and ownage, and double ownage, and triple ownage :D
stay safe in perth and win your matches (:
jiayous from singapore :D

2011-01-14T03:39:00.000-08:00

I TOLD YOU NOT TO START ON IT
AND YOU JUST WANTED TO KNOW
SO ONCE AGAIN, LOOK HOW IT ENDED.
HOW I WISHED I CAN LEAVE LIKE HOW MY CLASSMATES ARE GOING TO LEAVE.
LIFE SUCKS HERE.
ITS ONLY THE IFRST WEEK OF SCHOOL
IM FEELING THE PRESSURE TO DO WELL AT EVERYTHING
I WANNA DO WELL AT SYF AND ESPLANADE CONCERT
AND I MUST DO WELL FOR MY RESULTS.
HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE IF ALL THIS SHIT HAPPEN.
ANOTHER NIGHT FILLED W TEARS.
AND IM SURE.
ITS NOT THE LAST NIGHT LIKE THIS.

2011-01-09T07:54:00.001-08:00

im will be starting J2 on a good note, god please help me (:

2011-01-06T06:24:00.001-08:00

next stop happiness (:

2011-01-05T04:42:00.001-08:00

im super duper ultra scared of hwk ): very very very scared.

and i like to htht in the bus. (random but yups.)

2010-12-31T23:56:00.000-08:00

2011, A NEW BEGNNING.

to the hurtful 2010, thanks for making grow and mature into a better person. through all the events that happened, i can see my mistakes and i am trying not to repeat them. it is going to be really hard, but i will try. 2010 is really a year i never want to remincise again. Tears and pain made up a huge part of it. a lot of things happened in this crazily fast year. Orientation, making new friends, new decisions. adapting to a mix school lifestyle. learning how to communcate w people from different backgrounds. then comes rumours and scandals, gossips and bad mouthing. i have to admit t's my bad about the whole carpet grass incident, and im taking responsibility for it. i shouldnt have talk so much, talk so bad, taking it too seriously. i should be more graciious about it. then comes midyears and all the shit, never had i felt so unprepared for anything. and the worst part, im not feeling scared of it. procrastination and not knowing the seriousness if i dont do well. results is out, everything did the same. i don wan to see this results on my a level cert next year. tried harder for promos. i could have worked even harder, i know i can. but i didnt. hence my results again. gotta give myself credt for the improvement, but i know it is because the paper's easy. jerine, you can do more than this. also i better buck up on my geog and econs. no extra help! im gg to be really dependant on tracy for chem cos i really cant do it! maths im gg to do it myself, i think i can get my goals for maths. i can! geog and econs require much more effort, i will! also band stuff. went thruogh a lot in band, i really didnt regret joining band again. its sucha nice funny family. though we have differences, i really like how bonded band is. sadly i cant go for the japan trip. it would be so much fun. thank you vjband for being a good CCA, for at least making my jc life less sucky.

things that happened in the past year, up and downs. a lot of tears and pain, coming from shadow and also joanne, but also laughter from 10s61, band, vjcedarclique, jse, and my beloved sherm-cum-go home/come sch partner-cum-les partner-cum-a lot more. not forgetting junhao too, he's my bro. 2010 was a year of trying, and failing. i experienced a crush,screwed up, but nevermind its okay (: now im over it, and so be it. glad that i still talk to you occasionally althoguh not as often as last time. thanks for being part of my j1 year (: and sorry for anything too! appreciated the present you gave me for my bday a lot.

for the year ahead, honestly im not prepared for it at all. a lot of surprises, obstacles that i can already predicted, much more difficulties that are coming in future. how will i make through it, and how can this whole coming year be a better one than the last year. im pretty scared to be a j2, im not prepared to be one. but i guess since its here, i have to do it. just buck up, and chiong. its a MUST. 2011 will be a busy year, but im going to be 18. im a big girl now. starting from orientation 2011, let's make it a good year yeah?

to my friends, i hope we can support each other thru this short and tiring year. im expecting myself to mood swing a lot, cry for no reason, but its okay. once its over, its over. i don want to have any regrets, so jerine teo. you can do it (: to everyone else, you can too. be positive and stay strong. nothing will bring us down. love you all loads, and happy new year (:

my only wish, is to be happy.

<3 the start of 2011.

(thanks suyi for being the photgrapher!)

2010-12-24T06:36:00.000-08:00

i always wanted to write deep things and thoughts, but i realise i cant. Those that really pen down their emotionals at that point of time, self-refelection etc~ i cant! so forget it =/ i shall just continue reading people's thoughts then think about mine! i like how royce writes his tumblr posts. i really hope no one that knows him reads this! i think i secretly know how royce is already lol. but yah, he's not my fren! so yeah. one day ec! at the start of the year HAHA. rayna noes! mini changmin lookalike HEEHEE. talking bout changmin, today is the 7th anniversary of DBSK. sadly, they cant be together today. no fanmeet, no gathering. changmin yunho comeback on 7th jan, hope its not disappointing. >< anyways when for steamboat ytd! supaaaaaa fun. it was a vegetarian steamboat okay. and jasmine cut the fish like damn awesome can!? then rayna did the mushroom i think! clare w the tofu and threw all the sui sui one inside too! (LOL) huilin practically didnt help much except for taking pics! i defroze crabstick! ruoyu was helping during bbq take this and that go kitchen take off plastic HAHA. natalie with her pre-mix pineapple rice that im not a fan of! and suyi with prawn peeling heehee :D

and i finished week1 of attachment!quite fun now that we get used to it! me renice and jialing in the same branch! concierge and guest service(: i like to talk to the guest event though when they approached i'll feel so scared! melanie, melissa,shiela,shafiqah,sueann are all niceeee people! and young haha! except sue tat was from VJ last time!? if uncle jabbar not kidding. concierge got uncle jabbar, uncle nawi, aris, daniel(my bellboy mentor!),jega(the star of the month!),and a lot more that i cant really differentiate them/call their name! daniel is a total slacker but a nice guy la :D he give me food haha! and joke w me! and offered to share tips w me but i rejected(regretting now! LOL) and tells me bout his love story and how much he love her i sian liao lor. overall its quite fun i hope i will be even more useful next week and answer more questions! and get more tips HAHAH.

2010-12-18T08:37:00.000-08:00

band's off to japan! i will really miss them ): how i wished i can be there too, but circumstances dont allow me. honestly, if shadow was to leave me when im overseas, it will be my deepest regret in my life. i cannot bear to live with this probablity, so i have to make a choice >< sadly i cant go to japan! it looks soooooo fun~ esp with vjband, cos i really like them a lot~! lin, my closest friend in band, noobshit at the airport, if only i could go to japan and we can be partners there! yunsol ahjusshi, treats me to everything i want! ellie, the bitbit hahaha damn cute you cried at the airport before even going into the departure hall cos you miss your parents!(damn cute i swear)! peiwen my lovely welfare head, although flirting w evan at the airport but still my best saikang warrior and whining partner! jiahui and baolin my cedar bandmates and go home mates! iggy the annoying band pres but still responsible and funny as usual! omg everyone and everything really made me wanna go japan A LOT just now, but i have to think oif shadow! so its okay, i'll have other chances w the band too! >< anyways have fun in japan vjcsb and remember my presents! hope to see you guys back soon heehee!

and btw, hongwan's bro is damn tall i think he is taller than benny!

lin i'll miss you!

2010-12-13T08:06:00.000-08:00

i wanna cycle badly!
and i wanna send band ppl off at airport i hope i can~!

2010-12-12T03:31:00.000-08:00

NSSN 2010!
yayyyyyyy efforts quite paid off, quite fun!
but honestly it wasnt as fun as majestia ><
anyways i love the skit and evrythign that we have done tgt!
through this short period of time that we have only, its was a good concert done (:
thanks to everybody that came, thanks so much for the support i've heard you all shouted!
sec 4s i really hope you all had enjoyed (: and also join vj next yr!
through this i bonded more with ppl i wasnt close with! like JJ haha :D
*shuffles 2PM*
and my BFF constanceeeee! ^^ *shame on you*
and also the DSAs lisa & vincent! you two damn cute!
and vincent hahaha he is mini oswin he gave me a hug! LOL :D
at times like this i really love vjscb! its a pity im not gg japan with you all ><
had to sacrified. one or another ):
pictures up on facebook, hope it'll be all up soon then can start saving pics!

2010-12-07T06:08:00.000-08:00

intensive band prac this whole week!
hope NSSN will be a success! *prays*
and don screw up the solo! ):

2010-12-04T19:53:00.000-08:00

1 177155 4 <3
bogoshipda! it stands for i miss you.
had intensive band pracs for nssn! i hope everyone will like our perf
and i shld prac more! like my solo that i've just taken over for flute2 part
im getting panic attacks even in the band room when i play it!
shitz, hope i can pull it off!
6 more days to concert! gotta sell 5 more tickets!
and our ticket sales damn low la lol cannot stand it
rayna's back from australia, she had lotsa fun!
joanne's coming back soon
liane left, van's leaving soon ><
jin's in cambodia too
sherm's back from malaysia
band's leaving for japan soon!
i gotta start doing hmwk and study while working!
hope the remaining 3 weeks of no band can be productive!
and also save more time to be with shadow (:
im feeling happy today :D

2010-12-01T05:59:00.000-08:00

me: i'm going to dance for my concert
liane: wth. you dancing? you can dance?

how encouraging liane, you rock(my foot).

2010-11-28T08:10:00.000-08:00

was watching MAMA on channelu, and i started to realise i missed dbsk. A LOT. i hate it when they have separate activities, when jae only tattoo yoosu's name on his chest and back, without the other two. when back to watch 2008 MKMF, when dbsk was at their peak. changmin cried when they recieved daesang, junsu held back his tears badly. all these hardships they had before getting daesang, make the daesang very worth it. the fans back then waited 1yr 7 mths for mirotic. now, an unknown number of months lie ahead for fellow cassies like me who are waiting for the 5 of them to get together as DBSK again. not JYJ, not HoMin. i know i shld be support all of them, no matter with their individual drama, musicals, group perf, but everytime i watch it, i feel sad the others are not there. that no longer the 5 of them exist. back then, the music award ceremony was so much more believing. artistes that worked hard, that recieved much support, that showed near perfection performances, that made sure each dance or song was presented well, deserved the 3 big awards. today, boycotting of the event allowed other newbie groups to win these big awards. popularity over substance of the song and performance. i really hope i treasured the days back then when dbsk and other good groups like bigbang, good solo-ists like Boa, lee hyori, son dambi, had the stage to themselves. now all i and other cassies can do is to, always keep the faith.

2010-11-20T03:25:00.000-08:00

life really really suck.
i had reallyreally bad dreams, its my worst nightmare ever.
i got beaten up by idk who, but i was so hurted.
then came band.
at first it was fun, and everything got ruined
ruined totally
i hate the system
i don understand it at all
its just a way to increase band fund?
im not saying its whoever fault
its the system. i don get it.
i was late for 1min
that one freaking min
not like i strolled in and showed bad attitude even when i was late
people with eyes saw tat i ran in. I RAN IN OKAY?
can the rule be more flexible?
fining me doesnt help deter ppl from getting late
cos people like me stay in yio chu kang
and takes so frigging long to get to school
what time do you wan me to wake up?
give me a life dude.
the real bank slackers and ponners are not getting their fines too
and what? They continue not having enough attendance.
even players tat do not commit as well
i noe im not the best band player
but i tries to play to my best ability.
the fine system is bullshit.
i have paid over $10 to band i swear
it may be nth to you
but its a hell lot to me
im not a rich girl
my parents are not CEOs or some manager
dad is just a part time taxidriver and technical officer
mum's just a homemaker
my brother is a spendthrift
i have a dying dog at home
can you all stop taking money from me as if i have so much to spare
i dont okay?
i was so effing pissed just now
cos you said you will double the fine if i still run awway from it
easily said
do you think doubling it will make me more wary not to be late?
no. i'll just hate the system even more
and rebel from it
one more time
if im late for the freaking 1min
and you all booked me
i'll never ever pay
i'll ask the teachers to pay for me
get it.
just go away.
life sucks/
i hate today. i hate so much i could cry at the band room
and im crying now.

2010-11-16T06:23:00.000-08:00

been really tired lately.
dont ask me why but i just am
i just wanna sleep~
been thinking bout stuff recently
why can it become so different from what i think it is
i once thgt everything felt so good,
but now, on the surface it is,
deep down i don think so.
is it me?
idk why, i cant appreciate it the way ppl do
i cant see it the way people see.
im afraid to let people know.
cos i don want to aggravate it any more.
may things improve. hopefully.
if only sms can convey true feelings =/

2010-11-11T02:58:00.001-08:00

stop making me lie for you.
im not a lying machine.

2010-11-06T23:43:00.000-07:00

live life the way you want it
it's your life, not theirs.

(:

feeling optimistic suddenly (:

2010-11-06T02:38:00.000-07:00

down with flu, sore throat, slight fever
screw this shit.
op's next week, i better get my voice back in time ):
missed the chance, nyak ><
im sorry rayna. ): ): ): ): booo.

2010-11-03T09:36:00.000-07:00

HAPPY SEXY 18TH JOANNE :D
yay today is overall a fun day i likeeeeeee~
went to ice skating again
but the whole rink was booked by a private event
so i began thinking it is some handsome guy wanting to propose to his gf on ice (:
*awwwww*
but its not la. some angmoh ice hockey event. -.-
hahah changed plans to bowling which was quite fun :D
feeling really weak cos i bowl a while tired liao. =x
got this family of kids playing at the next lane, and they have cool accent
the green fat boy is annoyingly funny haha xD
played 2 rounds,
with liane beng the ultimate loser,
rayna underperfroming at first but caught up at the end(GOOD JOB (:),
joanne having some bday girl luck,
and me, whose bowling pose look like im going to twist my wrist.
then birthday girl was yearning for dingtaifeng's xiaolongbao
so off we go to 313@somerset for some xiaolongbao
its really nice man i likeeee too (:
i think i can just go in to eat xiaolongbao.
spent bout $13.30 there,
had more laughter at liane's bday letter!
oh did i mention their tea is awesomee. next time go i'll drink more.
i think tats the reason im very awake now too.
then we went to rayna house, me rayna joanne.
as usual the 2 sc girls...nyak shall not cont.
then we went in, joshua being dao as usual.
natalie appeared haha she's a funny queen. "Fyeah~!"
then we decided to play big2 to kill boredom
and jo suggested at forfeit for whoever that loses.(awesome!)
then we play play play~ and SHE LOST! hahahaha :D
of cos i must think of smth right, and my brilliant idea came about
from last night's convo -- Rayna's pinky dress. (Y)
hahahah we went thru the whole cardboard~! and compormised and compromised
cos the bday girl refuses to wear it, it always get stuck at the neck D:
she just wouldnt wear it!
from pink dress, to curtain dress, to red polka dots, to denim dress.
and we ended up with wearing the ribbon hairband
and she refuses,
then we end up with pearl hairband. NYAK.
joanne chew you're suppose to wear pink dress! ><
fineee bday girl BIG.
rayna's mum came home w some muffin thingy that was nice!
then she came in w joshua's results.
which is amazing! 99 for maths, 1 mark minused cos he highlighted the paper.
!?!?!? the teacher got prob.
the question paper never say cannot use highlighter!
so by right, shldnt minus.
joshua is so smarttttt. super. future sagar in the making.
omg maybe he is LKY scholarship winner! or president scholarship :O
hahah anyways today ended nicely. (: im happaye~~ (:
more birthdays to come! (Y)
happy birthday sexyyy.(:

2010-10-29T07:55:00.000-07:00

had a fun day today haha :D
woke up, went to rayna's hse
mahjong like crazy
whole afternoon sia
but i wasnt particularly in the mood
and had this stone brain for the whole day haha
didnt win once to be exact,
twice was when i played with mel haha
having the fluuuuu now cos just now too hot and cold at the same time
and i realise im always sick after i drink bubble tea =X
TOTALLY LOVING THE MASS SUDDEN KTV SESSION during mahjong haha :D
i was damn high with yao tgt LOL :D
we sang really old chinese songs, to the newer ones
and the 12min long qing ge wang super shiok haha
then we change theme to national day songs HAHA
cool shit :D and then it was chinese new year songs
then disney hahaha :D
and we round it up with 'my heart will go on' LOL mel's fav (Y)
oh wesang ru yan too! our class's xiao niang re theme haha ^^
shld do this again man, frigging funnaye (:
and get more fun ppl to come along
mmmm. cant think of who currently =X
lol and we totally treated ming as a girl -.-
liane and mel did come disgusting thing in front of him
even i couldnt stand it haha ><
halfway through the day we became rowdy and started shouting HAHA
i think we too cool liao LOL :D

2010-10-26T07:29:00.000-07:00

It all began with a simple tweet
(Jaejoong) Tonight, I will focus on composing! Hwaiting~

This is when things start to get a little funky
(Jaejoong) @0101xiahtic Junsu, you use a mac at home, right~? Do you happen to have the mac os x CD? The grey CD that you get when you first buy your computer~
(Junsu) That CD.. ? I'll look for it~ Hyung, you must be composing right now~lol I made the finishing touches on all of mine in Shanghai^^ hahaha
(Jaejoong) @0101xiahtic Oh, I see ㅠ I'm writing lyrics right now, but I have so much to say that it's getting tangled up and complicated ㅠ
(Junsu) Lyrics.. Hmm Have you made the melody..? It looked like a lot of melodies could be created from what you had..

Yoochun butts in here
(Yoochun) @mjjeje I have it~Or did I throw it away?? Hm~~
(Jaejoong) @6002theMicky Yoochun, I need thatㅠ I'm supposed to do a LOGIC UPDATE but it's telling me I can't because I don't have the OS X version 10.7 ㅠ

(Junsu) Oh shoot, I'm just tweeting to everyone ...I'm supposed to click 'reply' before writing my tweet.. Dang

(Junsu) Huh, guys, can everyone still see what I tweet even if I click 'reply'? Then what am I supposed to do? when I want only the person who receives the tweet to see it.. Hm..
(Jaejoong) @0101xiahtic You can do that by sending a DM~ (direct message)
(Junsu) @mjjeje Jaejoong Hyung (he spelled it Jaejeung, spelling fail), like this? If I do this, can only you see it?

His cousin ends up stepping in to solve the issue X)
(@iamyenny8) @0101xiahtic If you want only the receiver to read what you have to say, you have to write it in a DM. Everyone can see what you write if you just click 'reply'
(Junsu) @iamyenny8 Thank you my Twitter teacher lol

But Junsu is still fail XD
(Junsu) @mjjeje Jaejoong Hyung (he spelled it Jaejeung, spelling fail again), like this? If I do this, can only you see it?
(Jaejoong) @0101xiahtic I don't think that's it, haha

Then Jaejoong has a spectacular technology fail himself:
(Jaejoong) /Users/jaejunggim/Desktop/JJ pohto/R0010277.JPG An interesting photo~ Goodnight~

HAHA qien! junsu damn retarded lol~~

2010-10-25T07:46:00.001-07:00

seeing you list out all your friends that are overseas,
saying that you felt scared by the fact that everyone is leaving,
but actually,
im very afraid to be left alone here.

truth is,
no matter how much you know a person,
and how much she laughs or smiles beside you,
you'll never know how much hurt she is going through right at that very moment
she might be completely broken
but i'll never know.

everybody wears a mask,
and this mask will never be taken down.

2010-10-23T20:55:00.001-07:00

"happily ever after is once upon a time"

that's true, it never ever happens.

2010-10-23T05:35:00.000-07:00

based on psychology, a crush only last for 4 months
if you exceed that, you're already in love.

liane?

actually it applies to me too. haha, oh well. ITS ALREADY OVER.

2010-10-23T03:57:00.000-07:00

today when i left my house, shadow followed and walked me out to the lift. i was so frigging happy that he responded when i called him, and to the extent of walking with me to the lift, its a feeling i cannot describe. when the lift came, he wanted to follow me into it. it was a heartbreaking scene cos i could feel how much he wanna go out, but he cant. then my mum had to walk out to bring him back home cos he didnt want to walk back himself. seeing him walk back, i felt sad. sad that this lonely dog has to stay at home, at is living his last 6 months of his life. i cant bear to think how much it would hurt when that fateful day comes. shadow, his lonely shadow turning away from me, can you don't go. if you go, i wanna follow you.

dedicating all my 11.11 wishes to you, just to ask for a little more time, so you can stay longer.

i am crying again.

2010-10-21T06:53:00.000-07:00

a wonderful dream last night (:
the events are in weird order, but idk why, i felt super happy in the dream
i remember me with e at this shophouse look alike place
then we were looking at this notice board thingy
then idk what i was saying
but i think we had a very good chat. and i felt for a moment,
we were close.
the next scene was me with huilin
i think it was AJ open hse, and i took bus 90 smth change to bus 899 to reach aj
then i met her at the bus stop
and we walk in, passing by this field place
then i look in and there's this really short short guy
looks like got some illness =X
then huilin say her school affiliated to the MINDS
so got students that are mentally retarded
then we went to this ntuc lookalike place, a supermarket
then we saw this rack selling random sneakers
got this red one and huilin said that she liked it
then we saw boldwen and huimin(huilin's sis) tgt
then idk but apparently boldwen didnt noe huilin and huimin are sisters
so i kept quiet too
then i had to get back to vj
then while i left the supermarket
e was outside waiting for me
he told me i forgot my skirt?
then i look down and i was wearing fbt with a sch tee
then i just cont walking away and didnt respond to him
after that i waited for bus 899 again
then when i reached sch i went to PT
had this circus perf
and our PT looked like it expanded into the theatre we went to in sentosa IR
then cant rememeber,
i noe i was at first with rayna ruo sharon qien
then somehow huilin appeared at our pt haha
then i left for a while to talk to e,
when i got back,
ernest lim was at my seat!? with jingrui beside him -.-
then i bu shuang, i sat behind my seat and kick the seat e lim was at to make him go away
and he look back and say sorry and left with jingrui haha

and at this moment,
my mum woke me up saying shermaine is downstairs waiting for me
then im super annoyed and frustrated that i awake from my dream
super irritated >< then i called sherm then she didnt pick up!
then she called my handphone which reception fails all the time
then i pekchek ttm alrd super annoyed
then finally i call her and she pick up her phone
then i had this annoyed voice i think haha ><
just told her tat i wasnt going to sch
super nyakish max ):
BUT IM SORRY SHERMMM. DIDNT MEAN TO SHOUT AT YOU ):
i remembered joanne said that if you keep thinking of the dream
you can go back to it
so i think and think
but i couldnt fall asleep!
i felt sooo sad i teared ): like really cry lei haha
idk whats wrong with me lol
but i eventually fell asleep but didtn return to the dream

the dream doesnt sound happy/exceptionally nice from how i said it
but to me, i enjoyed it a lot a lot
it was a good dream i made since a while
i was so so so happy in it, somehow opposite to how i m now in reality
oh wells.
maybe i should live in a dream, even though its fake,
but at least im happy.

2010-10-16T00:10:00.000-07:00

我但愿有一个人在等我

2010-10-15T02:27:00.000-07:00

im scared
i hope this is only temporary.
i'll do pw now...

2010-10-14T05:26:00.000-07:00

gotten back majority of the results.
quite contented at least some efforts paid off
although i felt tat i was not prepared for anything
it seems tat 上天自由安排
improved from DEES to ACEE
oops. 2 Es >< no im not going to let this happen for CT1 next yr!
shall continue going out to study with chouchou on sunday.
pretty shocked at maths and chem results
but everyone did equally as well so...
im not exceptionally happy but satisfied bah(:
geog could be better if i could memorise like how i did in sec sch
but i doesnt seem to be working now so nyak ><
econs i cant really do much? its like physics
now im lacking a god-like teacher for econs like mr yau,
im so screwed now tat i think of it. =/
i must really work hard to balance band, other shit, and studies next yr! ><
i certainly hope i can be ogl!
it'll be so fun (:
with sports season again(my fav) and syf(damn scary) and A's,
its going to be an awesome 18th year (nyak im damn old?)
hopefully all will turn out fine

i feel that the whole school knows bout e
but then i think again,
it doesnt really matter cos we are not awkward with each other anymore
so, we're just friends bah (:
i hope this doesnt spread any furthur!
and usually ppl forget easily right!
*self comfort*
but how observant weiming is really shocked me.
oh wells.

the PAWS person just smsed me say she will email the results soon!
omg scared >< i really hope shadow is in top5! ><

PW kills me its damn scary i really think i wont get A ):

anyways a pic from marina barrage!

when life's good, we go fly kite. (:

2010-10-10T18:40:00.000-07:00

ytd was a very fun day at the barrage :D
if only everyone could come it'll be happier!
we played kites, frisbee, ball, water, eat, camwhore
meet a lot of people-.-
and laughed like i used to be.
met suyi and ruo for dinnerrrr at marina square(:
suyi is really damn funny i think i too long never see her D:
everything she says can make me laugh really a lot!
we went to esplanade to talk too, everybody.
make me realise that i can only do such stuff with cedarians
and that no matter how long we didnt see eat other,
we can still talk!
suyi says a female brain is like spaghetti, just link here link there
we can talk all night haha ><
and found out some stuff as well.

i didnt noe you were this affected by us
i guess it smy fault for not being sensitive?
i don like this feeling and i hope we are still as close as before ><
meet up again with you along!
i don like tat there are cliques within cliques
but i guess its a bit cannot prevent?
but i'll try my best not make it happen.
and be closer to the rest of you all! and tat i wont show it when im with you?><
yeps meet up soon dear and we shall carry out revenge plan
suyi is the da jie hahah we must set up our revenge blog!

2010-10-07T06:54:00.000-07:00

band is pms-ing the past 2 days.
haha wadever man
who can play those songs in 2 days :O
and like everybody no moood for band?
idk how many times iggy shouted at us liao
hahah ><
today we wanted to be late purposely.
and we had a reason?
but hongwan just had to be IRRITATING and charge me money
wth can.
i seriously hope he wont see this.
if not im dead
(you noe he very ungentleman de)
oh wells
wad can i do ):
wasted $2 wth okay im pissed again.

hope tmr's mass dance will be fun fun fun ^^

and sorry to my cedar vj clique! ><
dui bu qi ):

2010-10-03T01:38:00.000-07:00

holding back the tears.
went to the clinic with shadow
probably a bad decision on my part, it was too much of a pain
the vet took a scan
his liver is 80% down
maximum 6 months to go.
maybe i shldnt go japan anymore.
i dunno.
im very scared that he will leave sudden.
when that day comes,
shadow please tell me.
if you leave without saying goodbye..
i cant bear to type that i'll hate you
but i'll be a lot more sadder.
please god. don take him away so soon.

2010-09-06T08:04:00.001-07:00

im sad and lonely.
promos in 18days, wtf.
woke up hearing mum's cries.
idk what to do
shadow is not good
he didnt eat anything today
he didnt even stand up to walk to the door when the bell rings
he doesnt listen to mummy anymore
and he didnt wag his tail a single time today
f everything. i hate how everything is now
i don wan shadow to leave me
if he goes one day
i dunno what to do
who to face at home
who to hug when i need to cry
who to play with when im bored.
shadow i don want you to go
please don ever leave me
evne if you do, let me know
i want to be beside you.
don leave me alone.
please.
i dont have to motivation to do anything
everytime i walk to shadow and pat him
i really cry
yet i must not show mummy im crying
if not it would hurt even more for me to see her cry
and for her to see me cry
idk how to carry on
someone save me.
i cant bear anything to happen anymore.
i hate this year.
i really hate it.
the heartwrenching pain.
take me away with you shadow.
i wont be able to take it. i cant. i just cant.

going home one day without you waiting for me at the door ):

mentally drained.

2010-09-04T11:41:00.000-07:00

187days.

I wish i could bubblewrap my heart, in case i fall and break apart <3

favourite song. McFly
never thgt i would listen to mcfly jin must be damn happy (:

2010-09-01T08:31:00.000-07:00

i hope i cross your mind once in a while
so i wont have to feel so pathetic for thinking about you all the time

i hope i can pass tmr's chem test! =X
and don see him in school
and laugh more NYAK.

ai lin i miss you i wanna fangirl with you!

2010-08-20T04:47:00.000-07:00

nyak the yog website cos they don stream
matches that singapore plays. -.-
google searcg said tat channel1 is playing the match
but channel 1 on the yog web is like no working?
nyak ):
i want to watch!

2010-08-14T08:11:00.000-07:00

OH YEAH OH YEAH OH YEAH HEY!

productive day of studying with LIN!
i reached school at 830 or smth,
started with chem ><
quite okay, did some maths too
went to marine parade for lunch
then tuition got cancelled (wtnyak >< )
so decided to go MP library!
then went to top floor
and saw sidney, and he waved?
i like STUNNED.
then i waveback? ( actually wth was i thinking! )
he was waving to lin actually :O
then i like throw face TTM!! T.T
im never going to see sidney ever again!
>< >< >< >< tooooooo embarassing liao ):
as i was feeling damn frigging FML ttm
we went back to the first floor
then i chanced upon this set of yog pics
so i was like
'if i see the handball team photo now i'll be damn happy'\
then i turned.
and guess what i sawwwwwwwww (:
HAHA ^^ its like a instand medicine from my nyakness
then i like happy + high + laugh like siao.
used lin's phone to take some valuable pics haha^^
went to this scoop for art cafe to study ^^
nice env!
and we decided to extort our bday present from ahjusshi next band prac (:
haha! funny dayyyy (:
went to ggm's hse for dinner!
watched YOG by myself -.-
shld have gone to sherms hse to watch
so much more funnnnnn~
i had this slight glimspe of hope tat i MIGHT see him on tv
but didnt. HAHA(:
nvm! 23rd aug!
YOG yay:D i wanna watch a lot of matches.
but go home so late liaoxz ):
oh wells OH YEAH OH YEAH OH YEAH HEY!

2010-08-13T04:00:00.000-07:00

day4

haha today started happily, ended funnily (:
sam insisted on looking at me with specs
then lin & i decided to send her off to the eupho section lol
during asssmebly,
watched the yog videoooo
haha, he appeared twice!
happy! ^^
went back to band room
ellie say ilook very happy haha(:
then out of nowhere i heard someone say
'i think e secretly likes you'
its nichola.
then i like stunned :O
but like i cant do anything right><
then after tat ellie told me nichola told her
she noes tat i like e.
but like, huh! i never tell ANYONE in band.
only jiahui lin ellie.
>< nyak. oh wells. i think a lot of ppl noe? idk! ><
went for lecture and shiyao started laughing at me
cos of my specs! i know its ugly la. T.T
so... we gg to watch circus? O.O
haha, maybe =/
i thought of him the whole morning
got too influenced by the video heh ><
oh, ban didnt win face of the year. sad ):
wafiq shld have won! not kaymond(i've never notice him?)

chem tutorial, was being honest
didnt do tutorial ): so gotta chiong to hand up by monday!
shit la got booked.

geog lesson was hilarious co si sat beside mel.
she say i EC boonkiat! LOL!
then it went on to like... weiming -.-
NOOOOOOO. I DONT WANT SCANDALS><
took bus home with weiming.
he say i keep smsing boys. -.-
but its girls!he say i les-.-
and he's trying to grow 5cm! to become a pilot. HAHA
pilots are coooooooool~

went to his fb profile and was looking through the pics
then i realise one of his team mate
i saw him on the train b4!
cos his eyes tooo silt-y liao haha tats why i remember
and he's in mj floorball now! im gg to ask nat.
and apparently the handball team photo is at esplanade lib!
i wanna go seeee. and stare at the pic haha.
and its at clementi swimming pool bus stop too heh(:
i wanna see him! cant wait for his match *^^*

oh yeah some cool pics from eunice's dslr from ndp!

2010-08-10T01:14:00.000-07:00

went out for national day ytd :D
thanks ruoyu jiejie for the tix!
puay's lame joke of ruoyu jiejie = ruo-xia(prawn)
get it?
i think im the only one that thinks its funny ><
but it is whattt!
haha!(: *secretly laughing*
happy to see the cedarians ^^
like evryone's the same.
same old natalie.
same old clare.
same old jasmine. (:
talked a lot, bout sch... and guys (duhh right)
haha sim wei jie har~~~
natalie like guys with weird names lol
like hua qiao? tae kyung?
funny!
we had puay leadng us to the parade place
and everyone complaint cause we look like we're lost?
HAHA
eunice brought her dslr.
pretty shit i took a lot of pics with it HAHA
i love it!
i wan a dslr now too :D
but i cant seem to see the pics on fb..
so sad ):
gotta wait!
went off after the parade to PS macs to talk
funny! gossip ftw laaa.
wad else can we talk about!
HAHA
thanks cedarians for the awesome day!

talk to him online.
but like sian ><
he's not coming to sch already.
16days!
next time i see him is during the match =/
i hope he plays well (:
im tired of how stagnant everything is.
maybe its time to let go.
nehhh. idk.
i think too much right. i know.
listening to thrid symphony by james barne. the 3rd mvtm is frigging sad.

i like this pic from amber's tumblr, cos its frigging true. =/

2010-08-05T05:46:00.000-07:00

i seriously hate it when ppl obstruct me from catching me train
esp the freaking long LRT cos it never seems to come
even during peak hour.
wanted to donate blood just now
like i was prepared i guess? then couldnt pass the test. nyak ):
and we watch UP during geog just now
and weiming cried! LOL! its seriously epic funny
like i know im so mean.
but. a guy crying in lecture cos of a 5 min clip from UP.
HAHA^^ 感性的男人啦~
had band. was quite fun i like zi high with lin~!
cos she managed to piggyback me haha
then we were running around lol
and she put me beside hw-.-
but rehearsal was such a waste of time!! D:
like damn frigging sian.
watched VS versus SSS c div soccer finals!
it went down to penalty shootout.
its quite wasted la. like finals, then penalty.
it was a close fight though
both sides tried to shoot
very long never watch soccer liao, quite happy:D
sorry to ruo qien amber, i didnt noe had to go home with you all ):
quite a nyak day. gotta do eom and compre now.
and i wanna msn too. no time ><
and fml tmr must go rehearsal again miss lecture-.-
i don wannnnnnnnnnn. ): ): ):

bdd (:

2010-08-04T07:52:00.001-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MYSELF:D
and thanks for the message at 00.02am. *^^*

2010-07-30T08:05:00.000-07:00

band CIP!
the bus journey was soooo entertaining ^^
can i write everything here?
i dont think anyone reads right!
have to pour it out like tell somebody!
okay for safety reasons i use shortform.
sol started by playing thruth or dare with da.
then we were like listening and ya laa.
making fun of saggy in the process too haha:D
then we started asking yunsol bout he and his gf!
then he insisted tat i say who told me
then i say la!
he wanted to bargain like
we ask him one question he ask us one
but 3 of us too guai liao, nth to answer:D
then we ask how long they are tgt - 16mths.
how he noe her - rgs-vs convention
the most romantic thing he did for her is during her bday!
she had to celeb with her friends
so he can only celeb at night
so he put candles all the way from the lift to the bday cake!
i like. its like romantic ><

2010-07-27T04:08:00.001-07:00

this is too joke alrd.
i realised ive been living in denial for like how many days.
i counted my econs mark wrongly
so. actually i got a S.
damn it. damn it man!
FCUK ><
i really wanna kill myself.
i missed E by 0.4. WTS!

2010-07-27T03:47:00.000-07:00

had PT talk in the morn
i quite like it,i was listening
and like the ex victorian
maybe i shld listen to him
like. study. scholarships, career. etc
he's quite funny yo^^
had lecture. with lim and lulu
scary sia.
and like damn nyak!?
we and lulu like friend sia.
now he knows bout yutian and van, tat liane thinks he's handsome,
saw rayna's baby pic, know bout the scgs girls quarrel...NYAK!
and lim ask rayna to lend him her paper wth lol ><
lim: " eh rayna can i see wad you write? "
me and rayna. *SHOCK! O_O*
lol >< evrything was so nyak!
then joanne ask why lim don ask her to ask rayna he ownself ask
then khai say he flirting. super nyak idk how else to explain x.x
and rayna is weird. like she prays when she's cold!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA shit its funny!
oh another one.
me: "my hands quite white sia"
rayna : "..... hAh~!"
LOL! xD
after hearing us talk lulu was like
'eh wad if i join ur class ah'
haha! i think he's scared of the scgs girls -.-
hongwan gave me 10cents today yay!
didnt want to use my $2 note xP
4periods suhana was funny with jr and benny
haha, jr wants a goldie too ^^
yay, tats the only thing i can see in jr: he likes dogs.
benny is crazily throwing paper at van and shiyao.
and joanne's bag is bag-napped by liane
we changed joanne's dp to us! YAY (:
i dont wan to become a joke ok.
stop telling anybody bout it.
he treat me and a joke. why m i playing along?
it will make me seem like i love that fact.
but actually i dont.

went home. walked to bus stop with fel jasmin shili
and like stood there for 4min without knowing eugene is there o.o
after tat i was controlling my feel super hardly!
like. idk!
wanna talk to him, but don dare to xP
heng i wasnt alone i cant do it><
and he took 55 like idk why pioneer is like red line!
and i think i talk damn loud in the bus!!
but i was talking bout eugene LUM!!!! ><
NYAK ><
im damn scared he noes tat im super happy over his number.
like. omg. damn throw face.
i'll like just die.
ahhhhhhhh ><

2010-07-22T06:57:00.000-07:00

can you all stop nagging.
i cant stand it no more.

2010-07-22T05:21:00.000-07:00

" i've never considered watermelon to an alternative to my drinks! "

lol:D
had sectionals just now! almost made linlin angry :O
i wanna go japan!!
but my mum's sooo against it.
the cost.
and everything.
i don think i'll go.
NYAK TTM ):
i wanna gooooooooooooooooooooooooo ):
i shall try not to be late tmr!
if not $2 gone T.T
hahaha just now khai&yunsol ahjusshi walked past class
i wanted to wave to ahjusshi! but khai waved instead-.-
awkward.
*puff cheeks up* ---- ahjusshi!
oh yeah and weiming drooled on qien on the bus!
LOL JOKING LAHHHHH!
almost. HAHA, i think wei ming wont tell me his secrets anymore!
i sorta publisize it HAHA
and beeny challenged me to oven toast! nyak.
obviously,
i lost!! *how could i have LOST! *
got back GP too.
quite dissapointing?
i got like E. ):
left geog. it better be good.
like at least D PLEASEEEEEEEE ><
but i kinda screwed it too. oh gosh.
life sucks!
eugene changed his bag. it looks humongous on him.
狼来了，狼来了，谁是下一个受害者! (QIEN!)

NYAK!

"daisies with a tinge of blue" ^^

2010-07-19T05:42:00.000-07:00

nyak yay:D
went to see dolly just now
damn happy ^^
feel really bad to peiwen ):
so sorry i pon band invest leave you alone!! ><
laughed quite a lot
about ah rul, and he appearing suddenly
and his gf too( liane... HAHAHAHA)
and liane's damn messy hair
and most importantly
joanne being herself! (:
she forgetted everything bout hospital and wad nots.
which doesnt matter,
not good memories anyways.
haha! she said her whole family knows she like tim
cos she kinda shouted it out when she was in the hospital lol!
haha she forgetten she said 'i wanna marry eugene' LOL!
but its okay HAHA:D
heh finally we can say, everything's over!!
love you guys<3 to forever! HAHA.<3

2010-07-18T08:29:00.000-07:00

im sad ):